Icky Inflatable Advertising

Yesterday, New Year's Eve, Les and I drove to Newalla for a reunion concert with his Gospel Band. We normally don't go any farther east than the downtown area of Oklahoma City so I was gawking at everything after we crossed I-35.

And was struck anew at the wonder and ugliness of inflatable advertising. Why? Why? Why? I wonder why anyone would think that the utter ugliness of anything such as a blue gorilla would entice anyone to buy a car.

Now I'm not an impulse buyer (usually) but especially not of a large ticket item like a car. I've never been tempted to visit an electronics store with a giant primate anchored in the parking lot. A hot air balloon, advertising 'Big Sale' doesn't beguile me in to go furniture shopping. Especially when the huge inflated thing is being yanked at it's mooring by the never-ending Oklahoma wind and covered with a liberal amount of the never-ending Oklahoma dust.

I'm a researcher (surprise, surprise!) and almost everything we buy that costs more than 100 dollars is researched thoroughly in Consumer Reports and through Consumer Advocate websites. I realize that that is not the norm. But do people really veer off the interstate on the basis of a large inflatable ugly thing?

Which brings me to my next point. Not only are these things stupid but ugly! I must confess I'm a country girl and the city is depressing, people and building-wise. I hate all the lights and the cars and the constant activity of people driving around, talking, shopping, spending.....Ick. Everytime we head to the metropolis to shop, I'm amazed at the continual growth and building that is going on. And depressed. Sometimes I feel like Iron Eyes Cody from the 70s Ad Council commercials about littering--rememember him? He is observing all the trash along the highway and a solitary tear trickles down his rugged, brown cheek. (not that my cheek is rugged! or brown!)

The sad thing about city life to me is the growth of so-called civilization. More malls, more restaurants, more car dealers, more ticky-tacky houses, more, more, more......Where do people get their money to spend at these places? And how do they ever find their home in the neighborhood of hundreds of houses that look just like theirs?

I went online to find out more about these blights to the eye and discovered that "cold air inflatables are the most effective form of advertising today" according to one vendor. And so affordable! Blue gorillas come in the range of 2,800 to 5,300 dollars! There's lots of other things to choose from: Duckies, hockey players, wrestlers, hot air balloons, Santas, eagles, Uncle Sams, horses....Oh and don't forget the wind dancers--those long hollow tubes of nylon that frolic with carefree abandon in front of small businesses. If you don't like any of the above mentioned shapes, you may pick your own--An (ugly) cold air inflatable can be custom made!

Speaking of picking--can you imagine the giant nose that could be used to advertise an Ear, Nose and Throat physician? Or what about a place that performs colonoscopies??? What might they use?

How about a huge inflatable Jesus to advertise Bible school? Too tacky?

In a word--yes. They are all tacky--icky--an eyesore on the face of the landscape.

'Cause we're not taking up enough of the earth with buildings and cars and roads and houses and megamalls and bigger and better and faster stuff. Let's add some hideousness to the air space too. Along with giant billboards and blazing bright lighting, add a dust-covered and dingy blue gorilla to the view.

P. S. And now for your viewing pleasure, I present to you Chief Iron Eyes Cody. Just put the face of the blue gorilla on all that trash.