Disclaimer:

Many stories herein are subject to the faulty, and sometimes creative, memory of the blog owner and should not be taken as factual, although the names and events are real! Kind of.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

What I've learned




Growing up in the country provides you with a wealth of knowledge about the world and everything in it. Some stuff you learn having fun. Some stuff you learn trying to have fun. But most stuff is learned while working.

I know that:
-being bucked off on your head really does make you see stars.
-Just about everything will eventually wash off. Or wear off.
-Running barefoot through animal pens is a recipe for disaster.
-If you run barefoot through animal pens, your dad won't want you to wash your feet in the cow tank.
-If you run barefoot through animal pens, your mom won't care where you wash your feet, just so you do it before you come in the house!
-Even though your brother or sister drive you crazy and you wish you could live with grandma because of them, you will be willing to save them from rattlesnakes, mean dogs and run-away horses.
-Singed chicken feathers is a smell you will never forget.
-Fried chicken is sometimes associated with the smell of singed feathers.
-Cute, fluffy baby chicks are food.
-Your beloved cat is a carnivore and will not become friends with your pet rabbits.
-Kids from town can easily be taught to mount a horse--backwards.
--Pigs can scream like people. Especially boy pigs who are being turned into ummm--not such boy pigs.
--Cow tanks make suitable kiddie pools.
--Lakes, creeks and ponds are great too cool off in, no matter how dirty the water looks. You really don't care 'what lies beneath.'
--Underwater logs buried in creek banks can feel remarkably like the neck of the Loch Ness Monster.
--Little weeds are lots easier to hoe than big ones.
--You won't die if you accidentally vaccinate yourself with the same vaccine gun and needle that you've been sticking into hundreds of cattle.
--Mouse bites really hurt and your grandma will rush you to the doctor for a tetanus shot.
--Your mom is capable of shooting snakes who are stealing eggs from the chicken nests.
--A seemingly worthless dog will save you when you are being chased by a mean sheep.
--In times of fear, you can jump fences much higher than your head.
--Pigpens are not the best place to dig for fishing worms.
--De-horned cattle can squirt blood a really l-o-n-g ways!
--Cut-off jeans are the best shorts.
--Plaids and florals do mix if you are staying home.

I know there's a bunch more great lessons floating around in my head. Perhaps I'll write a sequel some time!

4 comments:

Shasta said...

-The saying, "running around like a chicken with it's head cut off" has real meaning to it!!

-Snakes, like chickens, continue to move around when they are headless!


Thank you for taking me back to the country!!

Sarah Kamolz said...

Haha! Sounds like so much fun! lol

Megan said...

Ooooo....I have a few:

*Alligators don't mind sharing their swimming hole as long as the pond is big enough for the both of you

*It's all just fun-and-games until your 4-wheeler hits a tree or a really big hole

*Trees are good for climbing and breaking a few limbs (human limbs, that is)

*It takes extra talent to ride bikes on gravel roads and play basketball on a dirt court

*In lieu of a lawnmower, just turn the goats loose

Megan said...

P.S. Your blog is crackin' me up! :)

One Last Thought.......

Pleasant words are a honeycomb;
sweet to the soul and healing to the body.
Proverbs 16:
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